Hrmmm...

I can't describe how I am feeling at this moment.  I have always wanted that chance.  I never thought it was out there.  Even if it wasn't the right chance, it was still a chance.

I didn't realise it was one.... now it's gone....

Another chance would be nice... who ever is listening.

Make it like a scene from Serendipity.  That would be nice.  A chance encounter.

No.

A second chance encounter.

xx Action Wolfe

Poem #11

You might notice I write poem often... They are because I can get shit off my chest without being direct about what I'm saying.  Yet still express it on here.

I look at you're sillouette.
It's that nothingness that floats through the light.
Everything around you is vivid and detailed.
But you are just empty space.
You are undefined.
Which is expected, but the void stays.
I have got over the others. 
They were shadows, nothing more nothing less.
You are something different.
Untouchable.  Unreachable.
Unpredictable.
Anticipated.
Hypothetical.
Maybe you don't even exist.

xx action wolfe

A weekend.

I had a good night last night.  Very self reflexive drinking.

I was going to write a really long blog.  Decided against it.

So I will say a list of what is happening at the moment.

1. I think I have sorted shit out guys wise in my head.  Starting fresh.  No baggage any more.
2. I am worried about my uni assignments.  Hopefully I get them all done.
3. I think I might have to miss out on pride as Yoh Fest is on that weekend.  I kinda don't wanna miss out on watching my classes on finals.
4. I'm feeling abit distracted and defused.  I don't know why.  It happens every now and then.  Next stage is normally the lost stage so hope it doesn't come to that.
5. I am thinking of starting to volunteer at a local Gay Youth Drop in Centre over the summer for three reasons.  To meet new people.  It's a good cause.  It will give me something to do for two months.

That is all.

xx Action Wolfe

Poem #10

Time Out Time Up

I am going to be try to keep it together.
This time out has been what I needed.
I know I will be strong.
After all it wont be bad.  It will confirm things for me.
When I see you your eyes will melt me. 
When I look at you it will be cold.  Vivid.
I'm going to know that there is something else to look forward to with us.
Nothing will ever happen.
Nothing will ever happen.
I will smile, just to show everyone I'm fine.
No one will know that inside I'm tearing up.  No one will know that I'm hurt.
If they knew they would understand.
I have to move on.
I NEED to move on.
In a different time, a different place it might have worked.
I don't know if I'm trying to lie to myself to make it better, or because I truely believe it could happen.
I hate you.
I hate these feelings.
I don't want to see your face again.
At least that's what I tell people.
Secretly my heart races again.
That is what I hate the most.